By |

Hello ladies and gents!

I hope everyone is acclimating to one of the scarier parts of the year… daylight savings time. To be perfectly frank with all of you, I’m still in a mild horror depression and my recent watches have done nothing to dissuade of my previous opinion. In fact, they have continued to confirm my prior hypothesis on prioritizing attempted depth of character and story in lieu of actual frights. “It’s not the demons out there but the ones that live inside all of us,” type of messaging. 

Anywho, I’ll spare you all another long tirad and also say that despite the first two flicks on this list being flops for me, the third film was VERY good. Albeit being a little over a year old at this point, it nonetheless gives me hope for some quality cinema to come. So without further adieu, let’s talk about some “scary” movies…

I’m going to start off with the most recent of the three in the form of a Shudder film called, Slapface. Now, I do want to preface here that I love Shudder. I think they have some of the best horror movies in one place. And they’re originals are usually pretty good as well. I say that to say that the highly touted Slapface did not impress. The film follows two brothers adapting to life after the death of their parents in a car accident. While the older brother struggles to play both parent and sibling, the younger brother seeks out contact with a witch that supposedly lives in a nearby abandoned building. 

Well needless to say he finds her and the two strike up a very strange relationship. However, their companionship turns sinister when the witch kills the young boy’s best friend. And soon after this incident, the body count begins to pile up in a rather unbelievable way. As usual, I won’t give away any real spoilers so I’ll just leave you with my final thoughts… 

Slapface had good intentions. But these were corrupted by mediocre acting, some rather glaring plot holes and most importantly, a lack of actual terror. While the witch is not pretty to look at, she’s not altogether terrifying. She is also presented as more of a human with some special powers and a maternal, but also deadly, instinct. Which is fine if done well like it was in Mama (loved that film by the way). But unfortunately it wasn’t and it didn’t work for me.

And the last thing I will say is that the underlying theme of abuse coupled with the aspect of loss can play very well in horror. But in Slapface the agenda is pushed too hard to where it goes past obvious and into a space where the blatant angles on these issues crush what could have been a quality scary movie. 

The next film on our list is the underwater haunted house flick known as, The Deep House. I mean… if this isn’t the epitome of what I’m talking about in the decline of horror then I don’t know what is! It’s literally a haunted house at the bottom of a lake. Why did it need to be at the bottom of a lake!?!? The short and narrow of it is a couple abroad in Europe stumble upon the legend of a submerged house that’s perfectly preserved under a lake. But of course, once they dive down and enter this watery abode they soon find a dark secret inside… 

I could give you more but that’s really all you need. There is nothing new or exciting about this film apart from the half-baked idea to place the house underwater. I suppose one could argue the divers running out of oxygen combined with the claustrophobic feel of the home adds an element of dread but apart from a couple jump scares (which I love… when done right) this film fell short of the mark for me. 

Again, my biggest gripe is that this didn’t have to be filmed underwater. I think that was a concept that hadn’t been done before and the studio said, “Well that’s a new one, let’s go for it!” The diving masks made it so that you can’t really see the characters’ faces and something is lost in not fully watching the emotion that arises in certain instances. This could have been a much scarier, much more interesting film had they just stuck to the old haunted house in the woods plot and not tried to be so outside the box. 

And the final film I will drop in here was in fact a very good horror movie AND allowed for some allegorical subtext about living within a fringe group and the personal and inherited traumas that coincide. The Vigil takes place in a Hasidic neighborhood of Brooklyn, NY. A young man accepts an offer from his former rabbi to watch over the body of a recently deceased member of the community. But once inside the home, things start to go wrong for him very quickly. 

Now, this film worked for multiple reasons. The first being the setting. This was clearly a low-budget film and it is almost solely shot within the apartment of the deceased. But Writer/Director Keith Thomas does such a good job utilizing this claustrophobic space that the previous monetary fact quickly fades away. It’s dark and ominous and allows for the viewer’s mind to anticipate things that may or may not come to fruition.   

It’s well acted and unpredictable. The Vigil took the “haunted house” concept and not only made it work in a small apartment in New York, but there were points where I honestly didn’t know what was going to happen next. This poor confused young man is going through a supernatural yet self-identifying experience that works just as well on a psychological level as it does on a terror level. And that in itself is something to be applauded given the current state of this genre. 

And finally, the scares were spot on. Not overdone or thrown in wherever they could. But tastefully interjected to further the story and allow for those moments I mentioned before where something scary could happen, but it also may not… It reminded me in a shrunken down way of the Ti West film, The Innkeepers. Which If you haven’t seen, is horrifying in its own right. So all in all, well done Keith! You’re keeping my horror spirit alive. 

And that’s going to do it for me this week friends. As I’ve said, I am going to try my best to get these posts out weekly, but between life, work, and other such events, I can’t make any promises at the present moment. But I can promise I will keep you updated as best I can not only concerning these posts but where season two of The Grave is at as well! So, as always folks, thanks for reading and stay tuned for some more creepy content.

❤

Josh

By |

Hola amigos,

Spooky season is in full swing and I intend to keep pushing the scaries out to y’all. During the month of October, it can almost be difficult to choose what horror topics to discuss given the influx of content. Instead of driving myself near to the brink of insanity and attempting to pick the best one, I’m actually just going to pick a whole bunch! This week I’m going to tell you about some upcoming freaky flicks that I’m excited to watch and think you should be too. So, without further adieu, let’s dig on into some scary movies. 

The first little ditty I want to discuss is called The Medium. This is actually a Thai film where a documentary team follows a young girl who begins to exhibit signs of shamanism. For those of you not expertly versed in the tongues of the supernatural, all that means is that she can interact/communicate with spirits. However, as her behavior becomes more and more extreme, the crew realizes they may have bitten off a little more than they could chew.

Fortunately, we won’t have to wait very long at all to view this bad boy as it comes out today on Shudder! And if you don’t have Shudder, well… shame on you.

The next film in our horror line-up is one you should all know… I’m talking about the final chapter in the Paranormal Activity franchise. If you don’t know about this series, well once again… shame on you. And if you didn’t know about this film coming out… that’s actually okay because I didn’t know about it either until very recently.

Funny enough, this movie also has a documentary team/filmmaker following a young girl. Although, in this one, they are headed to Amish country to learn more about the girl’s long-lost mother and ancestry. Long story short, after some strange incidents, they all begin to realize that the family they have come to learn about is harboring some pretty sinister plans.

Unfortunately, we are going to have to wait a couple more weeks for this one as it comes out on Paramount+ (another incredible service) on October 29th.

And the final flick I want to bring to you all is a Spanish film simply called, The Grandmother (or La Abuela). This one is a bit of a shot in the dark for me but I have to admit that I’m sold on the trailer.

A model living in Paris returns home after her Grandmother suffers a cerebral hemorrhage. As such, she attempts to find a long-term caretaker for her decrepit relative. But before she can, she begins noticing her grandmother acting in a rather bizarre manner. And these strange actions quickly morph into a whole new nightmare.

And while this one will be released in Spain on October 29th, we don’t yet have confirmation on a US release date. However, I do feel like we’ll be able to find some pirated versions quickly enough!

Alright well, that’s going to do it for – wait… dear lord what’s that? A bonus movie!!?? That’s right baby birds, I’ll feed you.

Admittedly, I don’t know much about this last one and at first glance, it may seem low budget. However, after watching the trailer, I had to be honest with myself and agree that it has the potential to be a sneaky good film. It’s called Father of Flies, and from what I can tell, there is a lot to unpack here. The simple description is a mother is pushed out of her home by her husband and a strange new woman. And that new woman brings some pretty dark stuff into the house that their poor kids need to deal with.

But there’s a lot more to it than that… For starters, the woman wears a mask that’s seemingly attached to a phone chord. There’s a pretty obvious witch that apparently just roams around the home, an evil creature lurking about the house and a clown on TV! My God folks, what the hell is going on in this film?! You bet your boots I intend to find out. Father of Flies has an unknown 2022 release date so stand by. 

Alrighty, for realsies now, that’s going to do it for me this week. But as always, stay tuned for more updates about my upcoming podcast and much more creepy content. 

❤

Josh

By |

Hola folks! 

I didn’t plan on writing about another foreign film this week, but alas! Here I am talking about the Spanish flick, The Funeral Home. I’m not going to do too much of a recap for this since you can find that on Wikipedia (which I’m not bashing, it’s a great site and I will die on that hill!). Instead, I’m going to let you know why I enjoyed it so much and hopefully convince ya’ll to watch it. So, without further adieu, let’s dig on into this bad boy! 

The film revolves around a disjointed family. We quickly learn that a mother has remarried after the death of her first husband and she and her teenage daughter now live in a haunted funeral home. Not only that but all three are VERY aware the place has spirits dwelling within its walls. They just seem to deal with it and accept the reality they living in, however strange it may seem. And that’s really as far as I’m gonna go concerning the plot line, although I’ll probably divulge more as I discuss other aspects of the film. 

The first thing I really liked about The Funeral Home was how it was shot. The opening sequence is shot in (nearly) one continuous shot. It starts out in the yard and leads you into the house and all throughout its rooms. I loved this since we get to learn something about each character from various items in their rooms. But most importantly, the smooth handheld way it was filmed almost makes you feel like you, the viewer, are a spirit wandering through the home. I found it to be a very effective way to start the film as it felt like I was (quite literally) being pulled into the movie. They use this continuous shot several times throughout which only enhanced the feeling that I was a fly on the wall as opposed to just a guy on a couch watching a scary movie… alone… in his underwear… eating ice cream. 

Apart from the continuous shot, it was just a well shot film in general. The home is very tight so you get the claustrophobic feeling when inside the home. But mercifully, when out in the yard, you feel as though you can take a breath and regain your composure. The interior shots alongside a subtle yet creepy score also create a great ominousness the pervades most of the film.

Alright, enough of the camera stuff. The second thing I really enjoyed about the film is was the family drama. From the start, the tension between the mother, father and daughter is palpable. I mean, you could cut it with a butter knife. In a nutshell, the mother’s first husband was abusive but died in an auto accident. However, the daughter loved him despite his flaws and is still grieving. The “new Dad” is older and just weird in general but is clearly trying to make the situation work (He’s also got some weird relationship with a female spirit in the home with is possibly sexual and completely on par with his bizarre persona). 

Anywho, the real problems lie with the mother and daughter who are at odds almost the entire film. But underneath all the animosity, they really do love one another. This is all made evident at the end in a heartfelt yet tragic dance number after the demon (the main antagonistic spirit in the home) is exorcised from the property. And I realize, I just can’t say that and not give any context, so briefly – the “new husband’s” father owned the funeral home before him. He actually lived with the trio for a while but he disliked his son’s new wife (and for good reason). Eventually, he is told he will be moved to a senior living facility, but before he goes he invokes the help of a demon to kill his son, wife and step-grandaughter. There, I hope you’re happy. 

At any rate, the emotion is raw and visceral and doesn’t feel contrived or forced. HOT TAKE – this is what The Babadook should have been. Yes, I am in the fifty percent of those who greatly disliked that film. The scares were almost comical and I had to be told it was an allegory for living with your pain or something like that. Ask me if I liked Mother! The answer is a resounding no. That film was a dumpster fire. Another allegory, another confusing and absurd film that CANNIBALISED A BABY… Sorry, I’m a hot little potato right now.

My point is, I feel for the majority of The Babadook, it forgot it was a horror film. It leaned too far into the emotional aspect of the story and I ended up being bored. The Funeral Home did a great job of toeing the line between family drama and haunted house. 

Which, brings me to my final thought, the scares. Sometimes it’s just a sense of dread, a sound from down the hall or a phantom hand writing on a fogged-up window. But the film was able to create effective scares without using a lot of CGI or gimmicky tricks. There is a great scene where the daughter rolls over to see a long-dead corpse playing with her pet hamster. She freezes as we watch it walk into the darkness of the room and disappear. It was a scene reminiscent of The Sixth Sense where just some quality make and great acting made the sequence very chilling to watch. 

I’m getting a little long-winded here so I’ll leave you all with this… The Funeral Home is not a perfect film. But as far as I’m concerned, it did everything it needed to do to be memorable. And if you were one of those people who disliked The Babadook, I honestly feel like this film will fill the void that the former flick left you with. 
Check it out, let me know your thoughts and stay tuned for more horror content!

❤

Josh